Lessons in Peacemaking – The Other

Tom Fellner • Apr 01, 2020

THE OTHER

In the evenings, while in Bethlehem, I would go out for dinner with my Palestinian colleagues and discuss branding and marketing concepts and strategies. We would also have long discussions about the history of the conflict, the current political challenges and the overall sense of hopelessness experienced by the Palestinian people. I spent more than a few sleepless nights and anxious days thinking about the pain and suffering all around me… so foreign to my secure and privileged Midwest and now Rocky Mountain lifestyle. How did they get here and what can be done??



It seems to me the reason for this conflict, and pretty much all others is our innate tendency as humans to group people not like us, in the category of “The Other”. The Other, are people who are “different”, who don’t look like us, act like us, dress like us, or believe like us. It is the negative perception of “The Other” that I believe is the root of most if not all conflict. 


a woman is standing on top of a rocky hill holding a cane .

When we begin to fear the other, it can lead to apathy, discrimination, racism, and dehumanization. When this takes hold in societies it leads to the villainization and suspicion of the other, which ultimately leads to apartheid, war, slavery, genocide, and events like the Holocaust in Nazi Germany or the genocide of Muslims in Bosnia during the 1990s.


From a neuroscience perspective, this is an inherent human behavior. We naturally want to categorize stuff in our minds. There is nothing wrong with this. In fact, it’s needed and beneficial in helping us cognitively understand the world around us, to know what to act on, and what not to. What to fear, and what’s harmless. It’s ok to eat those fresh blueberries in the fridge but not the 10-day old sushi. The danger of this naturally dualistic thinking is when we start sorting people in a way that makes them less than us. We fail to empathize with them. We see them as less enlightened, less intelligent… foreign. We begin to suspect their motives, or worse yet, see them as dangerous. Once we see the other as dangerous to us, our families, our communities, our way of life, and our beliefs, we begin to fear them and fear leads to all kinds of bad mojo. 


When the Jews left Europe after World War II and the unspeakable horrors of the Holocaust, they were in a fight or flight mentality, that never really left their collective mindset. So what you have is a whole culture, a whole people, taught from a young age, to live in fear of the other. Some of the emotional effects of chronic fear are:


  • A chronic sense of helplessness,
  • The inability to reflect before acting ethically or violently,
  • The inability to have loving feelings.


I believe this is what’s happening in Israel/Palestine. Fear, and at times, hatred, of the other. For Israelis; fear and hate of Arabs out to destroy them. For Palestinians; fear and hate of their oppressor, who stole their land and their way of life.


How Do we Respond?

So what is the answer? Where do we go from here? How do we change the hearts and minds of Jews, Palestinians, and Christians to love our enemies instead of fearing and hating them? In part three in this series on peacemaking, I will share more about the folks who are making a difference by encouraging peace and transformation… and maybe some hope to what appears to be a hopeless situation.


By Tom Fellner 23 Jan, 2024
Introducing a new series called marketing that sucks. I will be sharing sucky marketing practices I've seen repeatedly through the years and what you can do to avoid them. This will be a multi-segment series focusing on various aspects of digital marketing
a man stands in front of a wall that says how when why and what.
By Tom Fellner 19 Oct, 2023
Learn what a small business marketing consultant does and if hiring one is the right choice for your business.
a man in a suit is holding a iPad with a picture of clocks on it.
By Tom Fellner 11 Sep, 2023
Learn the difference between a marketing consultant and a fractional CMO and which is right for your business.
a macbook pro is open to a facebook page
By Tom Fellner 06 Sep, 2023
Discover the best digital marketing strategies to help grow your real estate business from stratch.
a flyer for sunshine home services offers a free water heater
By Tom Fellner 25 Aug, 2023
Discover how Bryt Idea consulting empowered Sunshine Home Services to take their marketing effectiveness and efficiencies to the next level through fractional CMO services.
a row of buildings in Breckenridge colorado with mountains in the background
By Tom Fellner 13 Jun, 2023
Discover how Bryt Idea Consulting took Breckenridge Lands' website presence to a new level.
A collage of images related to brand archetypes.
By Tom Fellner 19 May, 2023
Discover the secret to an effective brand strategy that will help differentiate your organization from a crowded marketing place.
a group of children are playing with a man in a green shirt
By Tom Fellner 24 Apr, 2023
Learn how Bryt Idea consulting helped House of Hope create a stunning best-of-class website with intuitive user experience.
a group of people are sitting at a table with laptops and notebooks .
By Tom Fellner 09 Mar, 2023
Learn how a digital marketing agency was able to optimize its customer onboarding process using systems thinking and online process management tools.
More Posts
Share by: